Monday, November 12, 2007

Yesterday


Ana, who turns 25 this month (left), with her cousin Nata, South Padre Island, Texas.

I had one of my recurring anxiety dreams the night before the Mass of Remembrance for my dad on Sunday. In it, I am in a foreign country and I have a plane to catch, but I'm far from the airport and my hotel and I haven't packed a TON of luggage.

Driving to Pittsfield for the mass I tried to analyze why not having my luggage would make me anxious. I travel pretty lightly and don't usually have anything I would be heartbroken to leave behind if I was at risk of missing my flight.

I occurred to me that what I'm anxious about leaving behind are experiences that I can't recapture -- being with Ana when she was little, my late mom and now my late dad.

My mom, who died in 1999, holding my siser Kathy, my brother Billy and me.

3 comments:

  1. I believe that is a common concern. I feared that I would forget the sound of my husband's voice, and was glad I had tapes made on special occasions.
    But I have found that memories are stronger than death --love is forever.
    Peace.

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  2. That photo of Ana and her cousin is worth more than the stereotypical 1,000 words. SO much in that snapshot...

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  3. Geez, that interpretation makes me sad. I have the same freakin dreams too. I usually forget my room number so that I can't pack for the flight I am already late for. Also, 9 times out of 10, I am staying in Puerto Rico!
    And of course, there are the classic, genetic perhaps (remember Dad's), dreams of college troubles: Being late for an exam. Finding out you missed a whole semester of a class on the last day. Not knowing your course schedule and so on.

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